Why is it that when you are waiting for someone to email or call you back time seems to drag on forever? Especially if it is with something that you really want to know the answer to??? AAARRGGHHH I think that I am not very good at waiting. -sigh-
Monday, April 20, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
If you say, "Surely we did not know this," Does not He who weighs the hearts consider it ? He who keeps your soul, does He not know it ? And will He not render to each man according to his deeds? Proverbs 24:12
Today a dear friend asked why we were adopting again - the truth of the matter is once your eyes have been opened to the depth of the orphan crisis, the need of children for a home - how could we not.
I remember a little girl we met at an orphanage in Addis - she was 10 years old and her mother had died of AIDS. Her father was imprisoned - and when he was sent to a MENS prison, because there was no one to take her in she was sent to prison with him - to a MENS prison. Fortunately for her there is an amazing lady named Hana who goes to the prisons and takes kids out and cares for them until thier parents can. Anyway we met her a few months later - she was going to school and had a best friend and a personality that didn't quit. She loved practicing her English and trying to teach my mom and I Amharic. She is considered an orphan because there is no one to take care of her - no one but Jesus through Hana's hands. Hana runs an orphange that cares for over 200 kids in the middle of Addis - for more information check out www.childrenshopechest.org and Hana relies totally on Jesus. I will never be the same and God knows it and judges me according to what I do with what I know - that's why we are adopting again - and why we are adopting an older child this time.
Posted by Bonnie at 1:39 PM
Sunday, April 12, 2009
So I've been struggling the last few months. Struggling in my thoughts about our pending adoption. You know how writers get writers block for various reasons? Well I guess I have been thinking that I have prayer block. It isn't that I haven't tried to pray about the adoption, it is that I haven't really been communicating with God through prayer. Typically for me that means that I am just rambling on and not expecting to hear God's voice in return. But it occurred to me this morning that there is more to it than that.
Fear. I have been gripped by fear about this adoption. I'm not totally sure why. I think with Miss B's adoption I had fear, but it was masked by all of the emotion and newness of the whole idea of adoption. There were so many new things going on that I had no time to focus on fear and uncertainty. This time around is different. Process wise we have a better idea of what to expect. We know that things are going to take a long time. We are a little bit more accepting that there are things out of our control. I think in part that knowing these things has made it a bit easer to let fear creep in.
The thing I learned with Miss B is that God is definitely in control. It was hard for me to take that initial leap, but as the process went on we knew that God was in control and were joyous in following the path we has laid out in front of us. Bringing her home has been an incredible blessing. and her bouncing through the house has brought tremendous joy on top of the joy we already had with the kids we already had. So when it was clear that God was asking us to go back to Ethiopia and expand our family even more, we knew we had to say yes..the rewards would be way worth it.
So what am I afraid of? well let's start with numbers...we are talking about going from 6 kids to 7 or 8. I used to joke that once you had more than 2 kids it wasn't a big deal because you are out numbered anyway. Well to say that we are already outnumbered is an understatement. we are approaching the size of multiple basketball teams. I am having dreams that bus companies are calling me to see if I am interested in the latest model. Not really but some times I wonder. The thought of clothes, food (have you seen teenage boys eat?), cars, college, weddings, etc. scares the heck out of me. We have been so richly blessed and I know in my heart that God has a plan (not just a sense of humor) and He will see us through. I have been blessed enough to know that as we are more obedient he will bless us even more. It is exciting but terrifying at the same time.
So why did this realization hit home today, Easter Sunday? 2 words really ... Resurrection Power. Christ promises us that by accepting that He was sacrificed for our sins that we will receive His power just as He gave it. Look at the miracles that He performed. Look at the compassion that he held for his enemies even as they tortured, humiliated, and ultimately murdered Him. Look at the miracle of his resurrection. Even if we just possessed a micron of that love, compassion, and power we could achieve such great things for Him. The the good news is that he has given it all to us. We can change the world in unbelievable ways. We don't have to lead congregations, go on missions trips, build shelters, or even adopt a starving child. We just have to say yes to what he asks each of individually to do, and we can make that difference that I believe each one of us wants to make deep down in side. Yes it can be scary. Like our Pastor said in his message this morning, "If we knew what was going to happen before He asks us to do it, we never would sign up". However while the unknown is scary, the rewards are incredible.
Now thats power.
Have a Blessed Easter,
Posted by Bonnie at 2:58 PM
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Poor Emma it is her turn to be sick. She came down with a fever on Thursday and it has gotten progressively worse. We took her to the emergency care this am thinking that she may have strep - the Dr. comes in and tells us that her rapid strep test is inconclusive - ?????. He does the exam and agrees she looks like she has strep. So now we have a Rx and hopefully she will feel better in the morning. Poor kiddo she is upset to be missing the performance of the Crown at church this afternoon.
Posted by Bonnie at 9:53 AM
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Did you know that God pursues us? Each and every one of us. Before we were even born God pursued us all the way to the cross. I don't remember a time when I didn't know Jesus, when my heart wasn't sealed to His, and over the years it has been so cool to see how God has pursued each of our kids how they have grown and really stepped out with thier faith. With Becca it has been amazing to see how God is pursuing her little heart. Her hands down favorite books are Bible stories - she sings Jesus loves me on the top of her little voice all the time. God is definately pursuing her. As we approach Easter this weekend - may we all remember that God pursued us to the cross so that we could live with Him in eternity.
Posted by Bonnie at 3:56 PM
Brandon Heath has a great song - Give me your eyes. It is a powerful prayer. If you want God to change your heart sing it / pray it with all your heart and see what happens. I don't think it is possible to ask God to change you for the better - conform you to his heart and remain the same.
The chorus is:
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
Ones that are far beyond my reach.
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
It is painful to have God's eyes for the world - God's eyes for the forgotten, the broken hearted, the orphan. BUT if we are to be His hands in this world then we need to ask for His eyes - and never be the same.
Posted by Bonnie at 3:51 PM
Becca has just developed a love of Winne the Poo - which is great, but she calls him Poop. So in the car the other day she was watching the movie Winnie the Poo and saying Poop, poop, poop on the top of her lungs. You just can't make stuff like this up. LOL
Posted by Bonnie at 3:49 PM