the TRUTH

The truth about adoption is that it will probably totally rock your world. You think you know what you are getting into - but you don't.

We have been adoptive parents for 14 years - our first adoption was a 16 year old girl when we had 2 baby boys and were only 27 and 28 years old ourselves. If you read any adoption literature you know we were set up for failure - funny thing though - when you are set up for failure sometimes you still succeed. It isn't that we were amazing people or that we didn't make mistakes (oh boy did we) but we did the best we could to love her and help her to become all that God had in store for her. And it was an amazing adventure, it really couldn't have gone any easier (well except for the car accidents - ask me about it if you are considering a 16 year old).

Our next adoption was Miss B - a toddler/preschooler. Probably the adoption that most turned my world upside down for alot of reasons. But she is an amazing little girl who really couldn't be better attached or better settled in our family. Have the recent additions affected her - of course, anytime you add a child to the family everyone has to settle down to the new situation, but she has handled it pretty well.

Now the 2 newest ones - Estifanos is probably the easiest child in the world - so sweet and anxious to fit in. He is one smart cookie as well and a total joy to parent. Alemtsehay is the most challenging child we have adopted - not however the most challenging child we have parented... Just because a child is born to you doesn't mean they will be easy. We have a couple of boys that at various times have really put us through our paces.... Anyway - is little miss hard - yep she is. BUT and here is the big thing - she is learning to have hope for her future, she is learning to accomidate alot of family all at once, she is learning to trust and love - things that haven't worked out so well for her in the past. Is it going to take time and skill to help her to heal and attach yep it is - but she wants it, and she wants it pretty badly so I think the future for her is really bright. (In case anyone is wondering - she loves me pretty desperately, but aside from her sisters she could take or leave the rest of the family - the day is on the horizon when she will love us all until then we celebrate every step foward)

The truth is that adoption is hard work - it is challenging and most of the time it doesn't come naturally (at least to me). But I am always reminded what love the Father has for us that despite everyting wrong with us he chose to adopt us - to call us coheirs with Christ, I will always be humbled by that - would that I never get over being adopted by God and that I would never lose His eyes for my kids, adopted or not.